I have an incredible ability to predict how much money you are going to make. Do you want to learn how you can do it too? Great, read on.


Today in <10 min we’ll cover:

  • No Elon’s here – I’ll take boring and Elon’s can have the metaverse (and Twitter I guess)
  • SOWS – a framework for boring businesses to buy, build or invest in
  • Everyone loves listicles – here are 130+ boring biz’s we love
  • Peep my portfolio – where my allocations are going now

Tell me what industry you want to build or work in and I’ll tell you your future.

The framework goes like this: The sexier the industry → the less money you are going to make.

Not always true if you’re a brilliant tech founder, but for the rest of us, I’m pretty sure it’s just science. Perhaps that’s why everything in Hollywood pays poorly, marketing and advertising roles are at the bottom of the income tier, as are journalists. Too many people want to be those things, and the credentials needed are not high. However, there are just some businesses that get no love, and I am here for them like Onlyfans is for incels. I started calling these “boring” businesses because I am all about misdirection. If you tell people you invest in boring businesses they, first of all, are probably not going to be that interested, and second, want to talk to you about their new AI-powered, social media, Web3.0 dating app instead. Cool.

Y’all go hook up to the metaverse while I get paid to clean your house and mow your lawn in the actual sunshine. I have a framework that I learned in private equity on how to invest in businesses the lazy way. So I thought I’d share that formula with you. Because the truth is PE firms and SMB buyers; we aren’t rocket scientists, we aren’t moon shooters, we largely take something that exists and iterate on it. No Elon Musks in here. And that is ok because the world needs small businesses to serve us every day. So if you are intrigued by the “boring,” let me tell you what really get’s me snoring.

“Boring” Business Framework: SOWS

What is a boring business that you like to buy, build or invest in? Here’s my formula, I call it SOWS. Like cows.

(Stale) = minimal innovation

(Old) = longstanding business

(Weak) = poor competition

(Simple) = simple but needed business model

Step 1: How do you know if a business is stale? The Fax Machine Test

I’m looking for businesses that haven’t innovated. Less innovation means more potential upside and thus less risk. Let’s give a couple of examples, I went into one business and they asked me to fax in an ID. YES. Every time I do a deal and I see a fax machine I grin like the Cheshire cat who ate the canary. A great trigger:

  • do they still have a fax machine
  • make you call to place an order
  • mandate written orders

All great signs you’re onto a stale business model.

Step 2: Old & Been Around the Block

I’m always nervous about the young hot thing in the business world. I want to operate on the Lindy Effect. I’ve talked about it before but essentially the longer something has been around the more likely it is to actually persist. So most of the businesses I buy have a 5-10-15 year history in industries that have persisted.

Step 3: Weak Competition

Typically these industries have a lot of “meh, just ok, not that great, it’s all we have” types of competitors. Think about it. How many of you LOVE your landscaper? They’re always on time, have automated billing, offer services proactively, never miss a week, and pull weeds without asking. Probably not to most of them. Or how many incredible handymen have you had that proactively check in on things you need fixing, show up on time, don’t leave a mess, and do the job right? Uh-huh. Rare. And yet, their lack of focus is your opportunity to charge a premium for better, faster services.

Step 4: Simple But Needed Business Model

Nothing proprietary here. No biotechnology. No R&D. These are just highly lucrative businesses that typically are in high demand, that have more business than they can handle, and that if you can beat on speed or service you can charge 20-50-100% more. Just add billing software, customer service software, outsourced employees, and you’re off to the races. If you want my favorite low-cost tools for running businesses, these will get you started. The businesses below are all types I’ve owned, invested in, or done analysis on. It doesn’t mean that every business is great but it means that any business in this could be great.

Y’all ready? Oh – and if you want to read until the end, you’ll like what I have there for you. What I’m actively investing in right now as we speak.

Gateway Businesses:

Easier to Start – Starter Businesses

I call these the gateway businesses to SMB ownership. These aren’t always the best companies to own as you scale and want bigger total profits but they can be an interesting way to dip your toe in.

(Do you already own a laundromat or are you looking to acquire one? Take your business to millions in revenue! Click here to learn more)

Professional Services:

Home services:

  • Landscaping and another
  • Lighting Seasonal & Evergreen
  • Pest control
  • House painting
  • ADU and container homes
  • Home pressure washing
  • Property management Airbnb/VRBO
  • Window cleaning
  • Tree trimming
  • On-demand holiday decorations
  • Pool / hot tub services
  • Deckbuilding & staining
  • Gutter cleaning
  • Home cleaning
  • Laundry services
  • Carpet cleaning/steaming
  • Deep kitchen cleaning
  • HVAC installation and cleaning
  • Mold, fire & water damage remediation
  • Interior design
  • Home office build-out
  • Epoxy flooring
  • Handyman
  • Custom wallpaper installation
  • Garage door service/installation
  • Pet grooming
  • Pet care boarding & services
  • Moving services
  • Yard contracting, designing
  • Home garage buildout
  • Solar panel installation
  • Irrigation system installation
  • Awning installation
  • Foundation Repair
  • Septic service/pumping
  • Boat repair/maintenance
  • RV services
  • Home appliance repair

Real Estate Heavy Businesses

Auto Services:

  • Oil change centers
  • Mobile tire sales/service
  • Mobile glass repair
  • Trucking & logistics
  • Used carlots

Event/Seasonal services:

Adventure/Outdoors:

Entertainment:

Online Education & Training:

Industrial, Trades & Construction:

  • Asbestos removal
  • Asphalt
  • Concrete
  • Carpenter
  • Carpet/Tile/Flooring installation
  • Door/Window installation
  • Electrical
  • Elevator installation and service
  • Epoxy flooring/countertops
  • Equipment operation
  • Excavation
  • Fence installation
  • Fire sprinkler system installer/detector installation
  • General Contractor
  • Government contractor
  • Heating and air HVAC
  • Insulation installation (spray and standard)
  • Masonry
  • Painting
  • Pipe fitting
  • Plumbing
  • Roofing
  • Septic tank installation and service
  • Siding
  • Surveying
  • Tree Removal
  • Warehouse storage rack installation
  • Welding

Real estate transactions:

You might want to bookmark this one, we’re going to add to it. Keep searching, keep adding links and resources as we go. The beautiful part to me is the breadth of opportunities here. Doesn’t it give you that little tingle too? Money is allllll around.

My current allocation search:

  • Airbnb property management companies
  • Newsletter and online education acquisition targets
  • A vending machine business because I want to start one and give it away 🙂

Question everything & go boring,

Codie & the Contrarians


The Not-So-Boring Section